In Your Face, Buddy

So? The date?

SO awesome.

My friend whisked Wee One away for an overnight stay at her house (with much wiggling of eyebrows and suggestive comments) and off we went.

We stopped at a coffee shop and had coffee, where we talked long enough to have to buy refills, before going off to the movies.

We kept it simple, I think, because both of us were kinda wondering if we'd actually click hanging out as opposed to chatting via the phone or IM.

Oh, the butterflies. I had TOTALLY forgotten how awesome the whole first date, hand holding experience was. We ended up sitting in the parking lot and talking for about 4 hours when he brought me back to my house (will this guy and I never run out of things to talk about? Seriously?) because I'm totally a chicken, and I was too scared to bring him inside, because I am so not putting out on the first date. I'm too gun shy for that.

Although you guys deserve honesty and I'd be a big fat liar if I said I wasn't tempted because, HELLO, it has been like a freaking year, ohmygod, come on.

Ok. Slut moment over.

There was much smooching at the end, though.

And, as an added bonus...

Word has gotten back to Ex, that, OMIGOD, I went on a date. Word is that he is green, oh so green. Evidently he wasn't expecting me to, like, ever date anyone again. I think it will be interesting to hear what he has to say next time I see him.

Is it wrong that I'm just a little bit gleeful that just maybe he's regretting his manwhore ways now that he sees that I'm actually, you know, OVER him?

And the best part? I really don't care. I feel a sort of vindictive satisfaction, yes, but honestly his feelings on the matter interest me in an offhand kinda way, sort of a "Oh, gee, wonder if I've seen this episode of Will and Grace before?" kinda way.

Ahhh...life is good.


Interesting Development

So, this morning I am a wee bit giddy. Last night, I was mucking about on Instant Messenger, chit chatting to a couple of my chicky friends.

A Happy Valentine's Day message pops up on my screen from an guy I kinda know that ex and I had hung out with a few times, not one on one but in a group setting. I kinda thought he was cute, and interesting to talk to, but being attached at the time didn't really think much more about him than that. I've actually known him since high school, but you know how you know some people for what seems like forever but yet you've never really had a whole conversation with them? That's this guy.

Well, we starting talking.

And talking.

And talking.

Finally we got tired of typing and he called me. And we talked. And talked. And talked. About everything. Music, movies, the state of the world in general, politics, silly random shit.

We clicked. You know how sometimes you meet someone and you start talking and you just freaking click? You find yourself thinking, "Geez, finally someone I can talk to that can actually keep up with me! And doesn't find all this shit boring! And can actually debate about it in an intelligent fashion!"

Guys, he's so smart. Not in a geeky computer nerd way, not in an egotistical my-vocabulary-is-bigger-than-yours way. Just smart.

And? I have been asked on a date.


I suppose I should apologize to The Powers That Be for bitching about Valentine's Day. Or maybe this is their idea of irony.

But, anyway, I am off to dance around my apartment, because I've got the butterflies again, and, you guys, I haven't had the butterflies in freaking FOREVER.

Side Note: Is anyone else's Blogger spellcheck not working? Mine has quit.


Valentine's Day...Oh Joy.

So, I'm alone today.

Well, not alone. Wee one is here. And the critters. But in a romantic sense, I am alone.


It was one year ago today that Ex started cheating on me. Did I ever mention that at my old blog?


What a prize he was.

Holidays suck. Especially hearts and flowers everyone is so in love holidays.

Excuse me, I have to go gorge myself with chocolate that I HAD TO BUY MYSELF.



Oh, The Randomness

Oh my goodness, Jerk From Craigslist, next time you try to sell something to someone, maybe you shouldn't be such a damn prick about it, and then abruptly send me a shitty e-mail telling me you're selling it to someone else. Get over yourself.

And seriously, I feel safer with a gun in the house. Until all the Anti-gun people can figure out exactly how they're going to take the guns away from all the criminals as well as the law abiding citizens so that we aren't left unarmed in a sea of violent idiots, then they can quit trying to guilt trip me for having one.

Oh, pup, quit stepping in your own poo. For it is indeed disgusting. And the people who see me outside wiping your paws on the grass are giving me weird looks.

Child of mine! WHY must you make such noises, as though you are the creepy girl from The Ring, when I am watching horror movies in the dark? Please don't.

Hey cable company! I love Mythbusters! I love Scrubs! I love Mash! Please give me a channel where I can watch these shows all day.

Must I now turn to Huckabee as an alternative to McCain? It seems so.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.


This Isn't A Pet Blog, I Swear

But it seems that way this week.

Because, today, I think the powers that be were laughing behind my back as they said to each other, "HAHAHA, why does this crazy woman have so many pets? We'll show her!"

All I wanted to do was vacuum the living room, I swear.

See, my German Shepherd is a bit of a chicken. The guy that had her before me used to beat her with a belt buckle (lousy bastard) and so now, she's super submissive. As in, she will pee if you raise your voice at her, or if she thinks she's in trouble. It's the doggy way of saying, "You're the boss! Please don't hurt me!" Which yea, I'm sorry she's had a traumatic past and all, but an 80 pound dog wee-weeing when you look at her cross eyed gets tiresome after a while.


She's also scared of the vacuum, and while the cats and the little pup are small enough to hide under chairs and tables and whatnot, her fat ass doesn't have anywhere to scamper to. I usually try to let her outside before I get to her side of the room, but I was in a rush this morning, and decided just this once would be fine.

Oh no.

I get within about 5 feet of her and she tries to rocket past me to go who knows where, and I just know she's going to leap onto my laptop that's sitting open on the couch (O brain? Where art thou today?) so I grab her collar. Of course she thinks the vacuum is trying to eat her, so she spins around, knocks the vacuum over, whereupon the canister comes flying off, whereupon the fuckin' thing starts shrieking like all the demons of hell, whereupon she pees ALL OVER MY FOOT.

80 pound dogs pee A LOT.

Today is not looking good.


Haiku Friday Pt. 2

Haiku Friday

Tiny little pup
You are smarter than I thought
Always poop outside

So far no chewing
Except on the other dog
She is sick of you

Don't go over there
Do you not hear me calling
Now I have to run

No you still can't go
Quit trying to go 'round me
I block you with foot

Tiny little pup
I think I found your one flaw
Stubborn little shit

To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky at the above link with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your generic blog URL). We will delete your link if it doesn’t go to a haiku. If you need help with this, contact Christina.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button above.


So...What Country Should I Move To?

Well, Americans have spoken.

Evidently a great many of Ron Paul's supporters are great at clicking a mouse, leaving rude comments on news sites, and text messaging their asses off, but when it comes down to actually tearing themselves away from their computers and go out to vote...not so much.

Evidently it's all well and good to howl and scream about liberty and freedom and the constitution on some message board, but when he actually needs you to stand up and be counted...well folks, you let him down.

Big time.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the fact of the matter is that Ron's pretty much finished. He's still running a distant fourth. He didn't do well on Super Tuesday. Face the facts, guys-he's not gonna be president.


It looks as though I need to start looking into a new place to win, because, seriously? McCain? No. This guy is basically Bush part 2. Romney? Basically, when it boils down to it, he's the same as McCain. 90% of their policies are the same. I really don't know what these guys find to bicker so much about.


And don't get me started on Obama or Hillary. I want a president with some freakin' political experience, thanks, and one with a decent game plan that doesn't consist of just yelling about how he will change everything and then not having any specifics to give about said mysterious change. And I refuse to vote for someone whom I do not agree with on anything, purely on the basis of her having a vagina. Sorry, feminists.

Plus I'm just way too conservative to vote democrat.

I'm upset. This was the first time in my life that I've ever felt excited, really giddy and excited, about a presidential candidate. I really felt like Paul could bring this country out of its slump and get us going uphill again.

But I guess Americans are too stuck in their ways. Change? Oh, change is scary. We don't want that. We want someone that will SAY he's going to change stuff, but not actually change anything, cuz yea, we'd rather just sit here while our country collapses around our ears then actually have to deal with things being a little different. Freedom? Taking care of ourselves? Who needs that? Let's just let the government tell us what to do and wipe our asses and hey, if they want to read our e-mails and restrict our freedoms in the process, who cares?

So, what countries are nice? I like Ireland. Or maybe Scotland. Canada, maybe? Catwoman, your blog title is so totally me right now, cuz I'm totally thinking Canadian Thoughts In Texas.

I like Australia, but good grief, too many deadly things live there.


I'm so sad.


Thriller Lizards

Because, you know, the best reason to watch the Superbowl is the commercials...and I frickin' love this one.


What Have I Done?

Oh lord, people, what did I do?

The housetraining, the chewing....

But just look at those eyes...and she was an orphan...can I use the excuse of it being maternal instinct?

Yea, that sounds good to me.

It had nothing to do with the floppy ears, the wee little paws, the teensy nose...

Nope, not at all.


Haiku Friday!

Haiku Friday

watching Lost again
don't know what is going on
might have a stroke now

dance of rage on couch
what could be wrong with mama
Lost is now over.

what is smoke monster
who is ghost man in cabin
so many questions

while I sleep in peace
cats destroy the house with glee
why bounce off my head?

dog sits over there
airborne fur floats gently by
how is dog not bald?

To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky at the above link with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your generic blog URL). We will delete your link if it doesn’t go to a haiku. If you need help with this, contact Christina.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button above.